Redneck Homos

They don’t wear flannel or have a straw hat that’s for sure or hold toothpicks in their mouths. That’s just down south stigma for a normal southern man or at least the one that are farmhands. The new southern man wears normal clothes, but oddly enough you can’t really pick Redneck Homos out in a crowd. They’re really stealthy, not unlike the elusive Homo-Thug. The normal clothes they wear are slightly, tighter than usual and often clash. Then again, that’s everyman’s wardrobe down in the V.B. Still, the Redneck Homo is a funny species, but yet an interesting sub-culture of homosexuality. They don’t all look like Tim McGraw, but they’re definitely unique.

During my stay in The V.B. (Virginia Beach), I was cruised a few times by the Redneck Homos (Cornfed-icus Muscleis) in a few shopping establishments, like that damn Super Wal-Mart or one of those huge malls that seem to be everywhere the further south you go. This one story comes from one of the many times I had frequented the local Super Wal-Mart. I am with my mom and my best friend, looking for some holiday table gear for my grandmother’s dinner. I am in the electronics isle, minding my own business, when a very well built man, crossed in front of me. Now at first, because I am gay, I take a look at him. At first glance, he wasn’t bad looking. He was dressed in a green t-shirt, simple denim and some Nike Shocks, but upon a quicker and further investigation, this well built man is damn near an ox. He’s all upper body, chest poked out, a slight gut, arms are decent, goatee and a baseball hat. “Scuze me goodlookin’. Can I git bah ya?”, he says with a wink. Ladies and gentleman, I give you the Redneck Homo.

So I’m caught a little off guard here. I look at him and smile and say “Sure.” “And a killer smile too.”, he says with another wink. At this point, I am now shocked. For some odd, ignorant reason I didn’t think I would get cruised or hit on in this state. It’s not like New York, where gayness is rampant and having a guy hit on you is not uncommon, but in Virginia, where Catholicism and Heterosexuality rule the day, I would have never even thought a man would be that ballsy to it down here without the possibility of a violent rebuttal from another guy. However, he did it. He walks by and I just stand there. My mom comes over to be and she asked me what was wrong. I tell her that the guy behind us just hit on me. “That guy?”, she says. “With the ox-like chest?”. I replied to her that’s exactly what I was thinking. “He’s got a USMC tattoo on him too. You know what that means? Someone asked and he told.”, she says. My best friend comes along and tells me that there’s more of “my kind” down here than I realized. All I can say was, “hmmm.” And not too long after that, in Bed, Bath and Beyond, I saw more of “my kind” and these were a little different, more rugged Abercrombie/Jock types, but definitely homos. Oh and it didn’t stop there, but when I went to see Rent, when I went bowling, hell one of them talked to me while I was in Abercrombie trying on clothes. They were everywhere, like my best friend said. I couldn’t figure out what was happening. Maybe it was me? Maybe my ray of light was seriously bright enough to get another’s gaydar going off? It was odd.

Now maybe it’s just my city-boy ignorance, but there’s nothing funnier to me than seeing a Redneck, in a Ford Pick-up, going shopping at Bed, Bath Beyond with his lover, wearing a beat-up Virginia Tech hat and a catch phrase heavy beer shirt. Including being flirty and affectionately touching. I find it funny, because I never thought I would see something like this down there. No alarms went off. No mothers scuttled their children away from the sight of them. No one shouted any obscenities. They were just fine the way they were in their natural habitat. Upon further research, I would’ve thought southern gays would be hiding almost, destined to find each other only in chat rooms, I mean this ain’t Atlanta, but apparently there’s a gay sub-culture in the suburban parts of the V.B. that would make really exceptional porn for Falcon or Titan video. Because the two Bed and Bath guys were hot. And I am going to take a guess and think that my friend at the Wal-Mart has hit on guys there before. He was too causal about it for me not to believe that he’s never done that before there.

Clearly the Redneck Homo has figured it out and has been successfully introduced into captivity. What I would like to know is how’d they do it? I for one would be a little apprehensive flaunting my sexuality in a place where Bible beaters are everywhere, just as much as angry hetero Marine and Navy people are stationed all over Virginia. In an environment obliviously not conducive to the gay-agenda (circuit parties, hot guys, and sex, drag shows, etc.) and no apparent frequented area or gay-centric bars or clubs how would a gay man flourish in dem dere parts? Just ask the Redneck Homo, they’ve found a way.

Home for the Holidays - Part 2

First and foremost I hope everyone had a safe and Happy Thanksgiving. Remember your blessings first and then everything else comes second.

As for me, Thanksgiving and the rest of the Holiday Season is always such a big thing with my family, large holiday gatherings are the rage with Southerner’s. Even while I was growing up in Brooklyn, we always had family come over in drones and I was cool with it, because I saw cousins I didn’t really like only once a year. That was several years ago. Now with my grandparents living in Virginia, not many family members swing by so it’s just immediate family members: My grandparents, my mom, my sister, my aunt, her two kids and the newest edition to my family, my oldest cousin’s daughter who’s three. And I also get this tendency to start talking with a Southern accent for a few days when I get back home, so right naw itsa lil’ difficult to get my big city talk back.

After my arrival on Tuesday, I was met with open arms to my family members. It was good to see them. Unfortunately, because of money restraints I don’t get to see them as often as I would like, so it really comes down to the twice a year thing for the holidays. So when I get down there, all I want to do is hang around the house talking to my grands and laughing with them. I truly have my most precious moments with them. Take for instance this trip, my grandfather finally got to see my tattoos that I hid from him for years. When he asked about them, I told him that it was dirt, because I refuse to wash my arm. He just laughed and walked away. I did feel bad for my sister, because she couldn’t make it. She called several times and was sad she couldn’t come down.

By Wednesday we had done more food shopping. My best friend took us to the Navy base where he still gets his military discount and we racked up so much food. We spent less than $200 on food, which would have run us at least $500 up north. It was nuts! Also by this time, I have gone to the Super Wal-Mart 3 times.

Thursday comes and my all my family knows that for years, I am a holiday ho. LOL. I love them. They also know that I’ve been watching the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade ever since I was little and I never miss it. This year, I got my lil’ (see mo’cuntry tawk) cousin Michelle with me to watch the parade. This is her first one, well not really, she was too young to comprehend the other ones, but she’s nuts for Dora the Explorer and she had a balloon in the parade this year so that was fun. Then there was a little surprise, my sister’s boss gave her Friday off, she didn’t tell anyone grabbed my other cousin and left Wednesday night. So everyone was happy that they were able to make it. All the family was together. My mom was cooking and she goes “Dre! Pass me the giblet!” I’m like, “What the hell is a giblet?” Apparently giblets are the nick name for the turkey’s kidney’s which are cooked with the turkey, taken out half way through and then cut up and mixed in with the stuffing. Needless to say, I had never knew that and I was a little grossed out by it, but I got over it quickly while I was stuffing it into my mouth with the yams. LOL.

And no Thanksgiving is not complete without all the sneaky, gay jokes my mother slips in. That women is a riot at times.

I go to Wal-Mart once more before dinner and when dinner finally gets here, I was extremely happy for my family and my friends that I have in my life. Then I got my grub on. I ate 3 square meals a day. I thought I was going to get fat or at least gain a few pounds, but that wasn’t the case. I watched what I ate. So it was all good. I kept up with my exercises a little. The family fun didn’t stop there. We went bowling, went to the movies, went to Wal-Mart 6 more times. My mom and I went shopping on Black Friday which was nuts. All in all, I had a really good time with my family and can’t wait until I see them at Christmas.

In The Meantime/In Between Time

No, I haven't dropped off the face of the earth. I've been on vacation at my grandparent's house for the holiday down in Virginia Beach, which I am now officially renaming it to be called The V.B. LOL. I didn't really have access to a computer. So I did my one and only entry on my sister's Limited Edition "Juicy Couture" T-Mobile Sidekick 2. (Yeah, that hurt to type as well to say.) Did I mention it was pink? LOL.

There's so much I have to write about. My family is nuts! I've known this for years, but I'm serious, you can't make any of this stuff up. And being down in the V.B. is like being in another country. They're so oddly different. I have so many blogs to write now. Here's what I am thinking about so far:

- Home for the Holidays - part 2 - what the hell is a giblet?
- BET has brainwashed my 13 year old cousin
- Why Homo Rednecks are funny
- My 3 year old cousin doesn't know Patty Cake, but she knows Ying Yang Twins lyrics and can do the Whistle Song. (ghetto)
- Super Wal-Mart: The New Suburban Hang Out Spot

I may even throw in a few poignant posts to even out the madness, maybe even a review for the movie Rent and Harry Potter. So I am going to be a writing maniac over the next few days.

Stay tuned.
Same Bat-Time.
Same Bat-Channel.

Home For The Holidays - Part 1

It’s the that time of year again when I visit my family in Virginia Beach for Thanksgiving. This year I wanted to do things a little different when I travel. I normally take the train, but this year the price has gone up considerably and my family and I decided to take a plane this time. It was such a better trip, because usually a bulk of my traveling goes to the actual trip itself. By rail or by car, Virginia Beach is roughly 7 hours away (sometimes more given the traffic, maybe an extra hour.) The airplane ride was an hour and 10 minutes. I was very, pleased. I flew out of LaGuardia, but was delayed about an hour due to the Noreaster that NYC the night before. Even an hour layover was welcomed, because it wasn’t several of them stuck on a train. However, I was entertained at the amount of gay people leaving to go to Atlanta. And my flight of course is a connection flight to Atlanta, so there was a large amount of gay people on the plane. “At least you won’t be alone.”, my mother said. She continued, “We should start calling the Peach State - just Peaches.” I cracked up.

I got to my grandparent’s house around noon and I couldn’t wait. I didn’t realize how much I missed them. I only get to see my family that I grew up with twice a year, so I gave my grandparents a big hug and kiss and talked and laughed with them for a little bit before the insanity began. The insanity is the frantic pre-holiday food shopping. Which is fun, but can be tiring because we have to go to different places for different things. So a few hours of this usually drains me. We got some really good stuff. Even I got some grocery shopping in for my time here. I am here for about a week. The holidays are here a little early and it’s seen everywhere I go down here. The supermarkets are full of the holiday edition snacks and junk food. So mom had to indulge in it. She told me that I can’t resist it and I didn’t. I did what I had to do. I broke down and I grabbed the special holiday doughnuts and some more holiday junk food and headed for home.

But so far so good. It’s Tuesday night. I am a little tired, but I am good. I got to see my best friend of nearly 23 years and we hung out for a little. I tried to work out a little in the living room, but not too much. I am really concerned that I am going to gain so much weight while I am down here and I don’t think there’s such a thing as low-cal Yams and 0 carb Ham. LMAO. I guess I shouldn’t have gotten the holiday edition junk food - I am going to have my hands full.

Other than that, my family is good. My little cousin doesn’t believe any of his toddler stories, but we laugh at the fact that he doesn‘t remember any of it. My mom automatically found a chair to unbuttoned her pants and scratched her belly. My aunt was happy that her granddaughter was here and my grandfather bothered me that my jeans were too big. My sister has called a dozen times, because she’s sad she couldn’t make it this year. So all in all - I’m home. And this is only the first day.

Aquaman: The TV Show?

I am not even going to try to keep my geeky excitement down with this one. The WB has confirmed today that they are working on a Smallville spin-off for Aquaman. A young, A.C. (aka Arthur Curry) made an appearance on Smallville a few episodes ago to investigate a new underwater weapon being developed by Lex Luthor. He shook up the story by having an interest in Lois Lane and giving Clark much deserved competition in and out of the water. (He's stronger and faster than Clark - the show at least). Aquaman's appearance generated record numbers for Smallville (already in its 5th season), making it the highest rated epsiode ever. The WB jumped at the chance to develop a pilot for the contemporary version of DC Comic's Aquaman, along side Superman. I found it very interesting that they would do this.

However, after reading an article from Variety, I'm starting to have some doubts, but I'm keeping an open mind on this new show. Here's my initial Nerdy-ThoughtsTM:

1). Aquaman is not the most popular character in the DC Universe. If you compare him to the trinity: Superman, Batman and Wonder Woman - Aquaman hasn't had that much exposure, except for comic books and cartoons. So a new live action show centered around this slightly, popular character might be a hard sell, unless they follow a similar formula close to Smallville. Which is essentially Superman living in Dawson's Creek style of drama. If anything, the hardcore geeks will watch and if they get a hot enough guy, so will the women. Keeping him Aquaman shouldn't be hard, but you never know with this whole reimagining thing tv execs like to do. Even though this past season of HBO's Entourage dealt with a possibble Aquaman movie, it still will be a hard sell for an actual tv series. Simply, Aquaman is not as beloved and widely known as the trinity.

2). Aquaman's abilities are often misunderstood and makes him sometimes to be a joke. I blame this on the Super Friends cartoon from the late 70s. Aquaman was seen riding a seahorse, talking to fish and really horrible hair. Let's take a look him: Aquaman's abilities are psionic in nature. He can telepathically communicate with any marine life. That means not only fish people, but microbes and plant life as well. He also has superhuman strength, speed, stamina, and endurance. I've seen him lift cars and even pop Superman in the jaw a few times and not even break a sweat. And I'm sure they're not going to go into the current Aquaman who's enchanted hand gives him limited magical abilities. However, they gave him some mastery over water in the Smallville episode, but that might all be abandoned when the show airs.

3). Making Aquaman into a teenager, or in comic book lore, Aqualad, isn't that bad. However, after reading the article from Variety, the show won't be a spin-off from Smallville. They won't make a mention of his Smallville adventure and a new actor will be playing him. And get this - the show won't even be called Aquaman?! WTF WB?! He'll more than likely deal with swim team trials, evil oil corporations and I highly doubt there will be no Kryptonite-fused villans in each episode. They better give us the good stuff. The Once and Future King of Atlantis is what we need. Keep it sci-fi and keep it good. Water-based villiany like, underwater sea monsters, invaders from Atlantis, or meta-humans. What we'll probably get is some slightly buff, James van Der-bitch guy, with shaggy blond hair, who'll look good wet and at the end of each episode learn something about life and love. Blah blah blah. Gay! Normally, that's all it would take for me, but this should be a comteporization of the character, but let's not bastardize him WB. Do I have to mention Birds of Prey? I swear I will. Don't make me do it! Grrrr.

4). Comic book serial adapations historically have worked (at times). With the exception of Smallville, the only comic book character television shows that went anywhere were the ones from the 60s/70s - Wonder Woman, Batman, Superman even the Flash had a brief show. (Where's that DVD boxed set you schmucks!?). These shows were okay for back then, because they didn't have technology on their side and bad hair, bad sets and bad acting was in. Exhibit A: Linda Carter and that god-awful Invisible Plane. (Joss Whedon, if you bring that plane into the movie, I swear to god??? ) The WB has a chance to develop a great show, please don't screw it up. Learn from your mistakes, namely those shows that have failed before and some of them made in Smallville, even though it's on its 5th season now. Another funny point about comic book character serials, many of them were DC characters, where as Marvel has always had the hold on the movie market. So DC, step in and executive produce this joint.

Superman's story has been serialized several times and I think a fresh look at a lesser known DC character is due. Oddly enough, I would have thought a show about a young, Bruce Wayne would be in the making after the success of Batman Begins, but then again - it's best they leave that one alone. An Aquaman-based show could help with comic book sales, who knows, but It'll be cool to see how this exactly turns out.

So I'm watching you WB. You cancellers of Angel. You're redeeming yourself with Supernatural, but develop this one with caution - you could piss off alot of people including me.

Chuck Woolery Doesn't Host The Waiting Game

If you remember a post from a few weeks back, Sovereign Bank acquired my company. Since then it has been nuts around here because everyone is in the dark about our future at this bank. There were the rampant, but yet unfulfilled rumors of possible layoffs for the last few weeks. News and other rumors have flown by us all, but more recently regarding the merger itself and the shareholders of Sovereign.

As it would appear, many Sovereign shareholders are in an uproar, because they feel they got shafted in the share price and that the company circumvented any potential voting they would have had against the transaction. So now there’s a case being presented to the NYSE (New York Stock Exchange) for a further investigation into the sale. Many feel that the deal broke several laws in New York State and financial projections have several predictions on how this merger/acquisition will play out. Notably one prediction is that the deal might not go through, if laws have indeed been broken for this.

One major issue would be the fact that as a company we’ve halted all income generating procedures. We’re like a ship with the motor off; we’re all kinda just floating here, going with the current. My department especially is like a stick in the water. We were told that there’s nothing planned, marketing wise, for the first quarter of 2006. So if we’re not going to be given money, to help generate revenue for the Bank, then that means that this company will be in the red of the first time in 150 years. As a company, we would be fucked. Major layoffs and selling of assets would occur just to make up or break even.

All I can say is – we’re all fucked.

As of Tuesday, a large part of my company’s project were either put on hold or told to cease, my department included. So what happens when a large majority of a company is sitting around doing nothing? Yup you guessed it – I think the layoffs are finally coming. I for one am not scared. I am just annoyed and overly anxious. I would just like to make plans of getting a new job, because I am not leaving before I get laid off. It’d be a stupid move and I’d lose out on a nice piece of money coming my way. So at this point it’s a waiting game. No one knows what’s going. Everyone’s floating around each other’s cubicles talking about the merger, what it means, if anyone had any plans. Many people are just cruising the internet for stuff to do. We can’t look at job sites, because any website with buzz words like “careers” or “jobs” is blocked. Damn them! So it's a big ole waiting game and I don't even get to have Chuck Woolery telling me about my consolation prize.

So as I write this, there are several people from my floor huddled around each other, talking about how they just don’t know anything. Everyone’s left in the dark. I do feel sorry for the older people who’ve been here for over 15 years. A lot of them feel that they’re too old to go through this and they’re not quite at the retirement age. So they have no idea what's going to happen to them. I think twice when I notice their grief towards my generation. So they’re looking at us “youngins” with evil glances, because I’ve been told at least 10 times so far, I’ll have nothing to worry about, because I can get any job I want. Then it’s followed up with a “And I’m 48 years old. I can’t put on a mini-skirt and go on interviews. I haven’t done that since my twenties.” I roll my eyes and say "Yeah it sucks you can’t go on interviews in a mini-skirt, but at your age, I think a sensible suit from Khols would do the trick. Because a mini-skirt would just make you look, plain old odd. Just wait and see what happens, like everyone else is. We’re all on the same boat."

So if I don't get voted off the island, I think I'd like to push some people off of it.

Movie Review: Jarhead

I was a little hesitant to see Jarhead. It didn’t grab me at first. Really the only thing the trailers/commercials did for me was keep Kayne West’s Jesus Walks playing in my head for a few weeks. I had a slight interest in it, but I didn’t know anyone who wanted to see it with me. It wasn’t until Kenny suggested we see it on our first date that I decided to give it a chance. (Thanks Kenny!)

The film traces Anthony Swafford’s (Jake Gyllenhaal) journey from boot camp grunt to a high-strung, emotionally drained sniper. He becomes a one-man killing machine, with emphasis on "machine." Thus the term Jarhead. It sounds like a decent idea for a movie, since we’ve had movies of Pearl Harbor, Vietnam, World War I and II, even the Cold War. The only movie that could come close is 1999’s Three Kings (George Clooney, Mark Wahlberg, and Ice Cube) Three Kings had more action, but we expected that. However, for those of you who like me, remembers the Gulf War (since I was in teenager when it happened), I remember it being much more than Jarhead depicted. That’s because we didn’t know about our ground troops and what they went through.

We're taken into the inner workings of a typical boot camp, as a group of men who wouldn't have give a rats ass about each other in civilian life, learn to work together and finally come to the point where they would give their lives for one another. It's a grim process made all the more intolerable by Staff Sgt. Sykes, played by Jamie Foxx. With Sykes -- declaiming, defiant, determined -- Foxx once again proves he's got enough talent to play just about any role. I actually think a movie about training snipers sounds decent, but if they’re not able to do anything with their training, they’re just waiting to fight. Waiting for some action. But keep in mind that’s what the movie is about waiting. Waiting drove them nuts. The long days of training finally pay off when they're finally sent to Kuwait, only to find themselves sitting on their humps for six mind-numbing months in the scalding desert, waiting and waiting some more, doing their best to hang on to their sanity and keep their raging testosterone in check. And if over looked, is oddly homosexual. Walking around shirtless and in standard issue green shorts was the norm (apparently so is having a floppy penis, because they were about a dozen or so crotch shots from random extras.), joking on each other’s dick size, jerking off in your bunk at night, while your friends either sleep or do the same. Once scene shows a news crew sent out to interview them, but Sykes commands them to lie about their increasing boredom. So during a game of football, the soldiers decide to get him back and call out “Field Fuck”. Which means they all strip down to their boxers and simulate sex with a willing bottom, while they all take turns dry humping and cheering each other on. Then there’s the Christmas party, where Jake Gyllenhaal struts around wearing a Santa hat over his crotch, gyrates and dances for his fellow soldiers. At that point, that’s the third ass shot from Jake. He beat Van Damme’s record for the most ass shots in one movie.

Finally the men see four days and four hours of actual action against the enemy. But it becomes painfully clear that this isn't to be their war, one fought on the ground, but rather an air war using Scud missiles and fighter jets with burning oil wells lighting up the ink-black desert skies. All their sacrifices have been for nothing.

The screenwriter, William Broyles Jr. , a Vietnam veteran, has written a war movie with no war. Which was odd for me, because he was the head writer/creator of the television show, China Beach (which had more depth than this). Don’t get me wrong, the acting is superb and all involved try damned hard to give this film a purpose. There are some extremely interesting scenes -- one, in particular, features Swofford with an enemy soldier in his sights, but he's forbidden to shoot him by his superiors -- and some remarkable insights into the hearts and minds of men who face the idea of death every day while fighting a growing sense of futility about their mission. The few battle scenes are also well done and infused with a great sense of dread.

In the end, "Jarhead" feels somewhat remote, uncertain of whether it wants to make a big statement, or if it wants to make one at all. By carefully avoiding any references or comparisons to the current situation in Iraq, it's not an anti-war movie. Frankly, it's barely a war movie at all -- at least, not in the classic troops-clashing-in-battle sense. That lack of war-clarity, makes for an admirable character study, but keeps the audience at a distance. You feel their desire to do something, which might make you queasy, because you want them to kill someone, just to make you feel better. You connect on a wierd level with the characters and that could put you at odds on how you feel about this movie. As a study of one man's war experience, "Jarhead" had its moments however. I recommend it though, if you like intense, story driven war movies, without any of the war.

The Evil Sanitation Department

So the fall out of my party last weekend has hit a new high.

I got home early friday afternoon from work and checked the mail like I normally do. I get to the mailbox and lo and behold, right above me I see this ugly, pink carbon paper. I thought it might have been a missed delivery slip from UPS or Fed Ex or something, but upon further investigation it was a citation from the Department of Sanitation. WTF?!

Apparently, the garbage man aka the refuse and waste officer, (let's call him fuck-head) peeked into my recycling and spotted some things that were apparently illegal to recycle in NYC. The report read that he found a plastic deli container and 4 plastic cups mixed in with the "other" plastics, metals and glass or a code 40134-(b)(c) or something fucked like that. Ummm. All of this material we've recycled before and many a times and there was never a summons or a violation, so what gives? Either this guy was new and by the book or a complete ass hole. Because of this peeking, I was fined $25!!!! WTF?! For a plastic bowl and some fucking dixie cups! What has this city come to? It's not like I'm throwing shit in bags from my window into the street. That I can see getting fined for, but this - it's not that serious. Now, I know what you're saying, "Dre, there could be a rule someplace that states that those things are not recycable maybe you're being too harsh about it." And you know what, you're absolutely right. I was pissed at the fact that nearly 5 days earlier, my landlord told us to watch what we put in the garbage and that she could get a summons. So I downloaded the NY Residential Recycling Guide. There's some other shit in there that everyone should know. Did you know you get a fine if they find a candy wrapper in with the paper recycling?! Could you imagine being fined $25 bucks for a fucking Charleston Chew wrapper! It's insane.

So I've taken the liberty to place the link for us innocents, living under the watchful and scrutinous eye of our state government. http://www.nrdc.org/cities/recycling/gnyc.pdf. The Great Eye watches and sees all!

But here's the kicker....not only did I get fined $25, but there was a court date appearance listed from my illustrious refuse and waste officer. I have to appear in court to defend myself agasint the tyranny of waste management in this city. Not only will I not show up, but I will have a few dixie cups along with my mailed-in, that's right mailed-in check. How's that for insubordination!

All Hallows Weekend

This Halloween will go down in history for me as one of the funniest and most entertaining weekends of my life. Larry (aka Baby boy at my crib) is in visiting from Florida and when he comes up, the other side of me surfaces and I become this odd, reflection of myself. It’s called fun.

It all started with a bunch of us going to Krash on Friday. It was their annual Halloween party, so the freaks were definitely out that night. It was packed, but cool, space opened up after awhile. I ran into a few people I knew, including one guy who completely ignored me up until he found out how I looked in a tight shirt. You remember this one? The one I spoke about in previous blogs. The one who doesn’t return phone calls, who can’t date me, but then starts dating someone else later – yeah that guy. That was a funny interaction all together. A little later, I'm checking out the guys, there were definitely some cuties there. Larry was a bit surprised that I wasn't my usual self, I wasn't reserved as I usually am. I was outgoing and flirtatious all night. Trav would have been proud. It was a blast.

Then we move to the party at my place that Saturday evening, which will be recorded for the history books as the night the Hellmouth officially relocated and re-opened under my apartment. Trav and I had a get together at our house of a few people and needless to say it didn’t go as planned. There was the usual, I cooked, great music, conversation and hot wings. Several gays and one lesbian. After the lesbian left, there was the booze, the making out, and the stripping. Did I mention the making out part yeah? The party ended up being two steps away from being an orgy. LOL. Nah it wasn't that bad, but there was a lot of making out and fondling going on. I wasn't on best behavior that night.

Sunday, we tone things down with a movie in the late afternoon, SAW 2, a walk through Christopher Street to the Pier, and back up for dinner at UNOs. Great time there as well. We all laughed and talked about the night before. We all think that we should have our own gay reality show, something akin to MTV's The Real World. "This is a true story. Of seven gays picked to live in a house." It would be insane.

Then on Halloween, we all trekked down to the annual Halloween Parade in the Village. That was crazy fun. The costumes rocked and there were so many people. I didn’t wear a costume this year, but I got inspired to go all out for next year. I am planning it as I type this. One stand out thing, were the quartet of trannies impersonating Lil' Kim, Mya, Pink and Christina Aguilera. They performed Lady Marmalade in the middle of Christopher Street, with a radio and a guy dressed as the wind mill from Moulin Rogue. It was too much to bear and so much of a pisser, that I cried when I saw it. I even got a picture with Darth Vader and Emperor Palpatine. The Vader costume was sick it had real working lights on the chest console.

I took Tuesday off to recoup and take Baby boy back to the airport, but he’d extended his trip for a few more days, so we decided to hit the city for a little to go shopping. I got my Star Wars on by buying Episode 3: Revenge of the Sith on DVD and got SW: Battlefront 2 for the Xbox. This game is gonna rock! We went to Little Italy to buy some meat - LOL - and cheese. Then the night continued with us running into LL Cool J down 7th Avenue. Needless to say, I acted like the only chicken head trying to get a glimpse of him, luckily Baby boy had his camera and I took a picture with him.

This was the best Halloween ever!

Me, LL & Juan